It’s been a long time since I’ve written and there are two reasons for that. First off, we had some computer problems, which we’ve recently rectified and the other was that I was feeling too crappy to even want to write.

I’ll try to keep this chapter as short as possible, but there’s a lot to report.

On Dec 22nd, I had my pre-chemo blood work as well as saw Dr. Stacey Abbis for the biopsies on my arm and chest. She put one stitch on my chest and four or five on my arm. My visits with Dr. Abbis and a nurse named Dee (who seems to always take time to be available during my visits) are always made pleasant. Dee has taken me under her wing from the first day that Dr. Abbis told me I had breast cancer. She happened to be working with Dr. Abbis during that time but now works for another surgeon in the department. Even said, she still takes the time to make sure she’s either involved in the appointment or at least to poke her head in and say hi. She’s very warm and caring and I feel I’ve gained a new friendship. I thank her for that.

On Dec 23rd, I saw Katie for my second round of chemotherapy. John and I went to lunch afterwards and then headed home. Within a few hours, the nausea kicked in, just like the first around, and the constipation as well. But this time I was prepared to drinking myself till I drowned and I had bought over the counter meds to help things move a little more smoothly. Neither remedy worked, I was still constipated. The nausea only last that one night.

On Christmas Eve night, I started to feel as though I was coming down with a cold or sinus infection because I had a sore throat from postnasal drip. By Christmas morning, I could feel tightness in my bronchial tubes. The greatest highlight to Christmas was that my family was together. My parents came up from Florida and it was so nice to have them here for the holiday. By evening my chest was very tight. After everyone left, John shaved my head because when I woke up that morning, my hair had stayed on my pillow. I had a Mohawk. It looked like a cat had been sleeping on my flannel pillowcase. Thank God Lisa had buzz-cut me the week before because I can’t imagine how devastating it would have been otherwise. It still takes my breath away sometimes when I look in the mirror and it’s been two weeks.

On Dec 26th, I woke with a 101.4 fever. I called Dr. Rao’s office and was connected with the doctor who was on call. Dr. Rao is on vacation for a month. She’s actually moving her practice at the beginning of February and is taking the time off in between. I was called in a prescription for an antibiotic and was told to drink a lot of fluids. I was trying. By now had a full fledged upper respiratory infection, sinus infection, and then I caught the flu on top of it all. I truly have never felt worse in my life. I had a fever for four days. My parents and my sister came down with the same flu just a few days after I had.

Chemo with Katie

Dee, myself and Dr. Abbis

Me and John on Christmas Day

Christmas with the family

On Dec 30th, I finally got dressed and left the house (I hadn’t left the house since Dec 23rd). I had an appointment to see Dr. Abbis to have my stitches out. It felt good to get out of the house but I was still very weak from not eating much while I had the fever. I still had the sinus/upper respiratory infection but at least I had shaken the flu. John drove me to see Dr. Abbis and she discussed my pathology reports. She said that both biopsies were basal cells, which if you’re going to have a skin cancer, that’s the one to have. I think it’s the least of all evils. But the bad news was that neither biopsy showed clean lines so they have to be redone. She feels there’s no rush so I’m going to wait until I’m done chemo. It’s a good thing there’s no rush because when she went to remove my stitches, my arm was infected under the stitches and just kind of popped open. That truly wasn’t a pleasant sight for this ill, weak body. She showed me how to rinse it with peroxide and how to pack this big gaping hole with medicated packing. Just another headache! It doesn’t hurt or anything it’s just time consuming and yucky. The chemo is not allowing my body to fight of the infection.

I went in for a blood count check on Jan 3rd. My blood counts are great. I’m not really as tired during my 10-14 day post-chemo period as I was told I would be. I guess I’m lucky in that respect, as well as not being nauseous for very long. And I did get one herpes sore. It still hurt, but nothing like the last time. The docs have stepped up the medication for that so hopefully I won’t get any next time. I thought the first treatment was rough, but the timeframe after the second was four times worse. It was actually sinus/upper respiratory/flu that I had which made me so miserable. Hopefully I can stay otherwise healthy after the next treatment, which is on Jan 13th. I’ll be three-quarters of the way home. My last treat is Feb 3rd. Martha Stewart and I, we’re both looking forward to March!!!

After all that whining, I have to say that I do realize that things could be much worse. My prognosis is great. I only have to have four treatments and not eight. I can’t even imagine what that would be like. And there’s been no word of radiation. I’m sure I would have been told by now. SPRING, I can’t wait.

I went back to work for the first time yesterday, since before Christmas. It was so great to be there. I actually worked eight hours, but it didn’t feel like it. I’m doing no-mind work that I used to hate to do prior to this whole BC thing, but now I enjoy it because it is no-mind work. Everyone is so understanding and appreciates whatever little I can do. There really is such a thing as chemo-brain and I’ve got it. I have a very short attention span and my brain does not wish to be taxed. My bosses are very understanding, and we all hope things get back to normal soon afterwards. I’m told that the side effects can last up to a year. Maybe I won’t be so bad because I’m having so few treatments. Let’s all hope.

John and I went to dinner at Giorgio’s last night. It felt great to be out.

My last chapter talked about not wanting to wear my wig and wanting to be accepted the way I was. Well I’m not so daring anymore with absolutely no hair. I have bought a lot of hats and dressed them up with cute pins, and that’s what I’ve been wearing. I’ve worn my wig twice. I don’t know why but I just have a hard time wearing it.

Speaking of wigs, I stopped in at Amanda Thomas, LLC, where I was fitted for my wigs. Jackie is the woman who owns the store and she gave me the biggest hug. It was the next best thing to my mother. I hadn’t seen her since prior to my surgery and it was wonderful to see her. I can’t recommend this salon high enough. This is another friendship that I have been lucky enough to make from this negative chapter in my life. Jackie is one of the most compassionate and warm people I have ever met. She helped make the very traumatic and stressful task of wig hunting, a fun and almost therapeutic experience for me. She actually took apart my two wigs to make them smaller for me. I have a child-size head. Although I don’t wear them very often, I know that I have them, should I need them. I’m told I look fine anyone who has seen it on me, it’s just me. Maybe with time I’ll get more comfortable with it.

I’m going to sign off now. Hopefully I won’t wait so long before the next update. I’m feeling pretty good right now, still have a bit of a cold but feeling pretty strong. My next treatment is next Thursday. I hate thought of it but the quicker it comes, the quicker I’ll be done. I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday.