My name is Claire Gardiner and I created this web page as a way to communicate the latest up-to-date information regarding my cancer treatment. I received many emails each week asking for an update. I thought posting info to this page would be a good way for folks to check and see what’s going on (and save me a few emails!).

My journal was originally written “live”; i.e., while I was being treated. I used it as a method for keeping my friends and family informed. I received many emails each week during my treatment and it was difficult to answer them all, so I created my web journal where folks could keep up with what was going on as it happened.  I didn’t start writing the journal until the chemo stage of my treatment. Now that this journal is published on this site,  (thank you Wendy!) I need to go back in time and outline how I got to the chemo stage!

Ever since my first mammogram (when I was 40), I always had to go twice a year.  They said I had “dense tissue” and they always wanted to see if anything had changed in 6 months.  They always took multiple pictures, and even magnified pictures.  At one point, they noticed some calcifications in my right breast….it was nothing urgent or scary….just something to keep an eye on.  After watching them increase over a period of two years, they recommended a biopsy just to see what was going on.   Everything turned out fine – there was no cancer!  My surgeon (Dr. Robert Cohen – Potomac Hospital, Woodbridge VA) recommended a follow up mammogram in 3 months. It was at this mammogram where they told me, your right breast looks fine, but we see something in the left breast we’d like to keep an eye on, so please come back in six months.  So, I thought “no big deal” as they always want me to come back every 6 months! Well, a little after four months I felt the lump for the first time. I was doing a breast exam in the shower and VOILA – there it was!  Now, most “normal” women would probably call the doc right away and say, “I found a lump….I need my mammogram right away!”  Well….I was in denial…..this wasn’t cancer!  So I waited until it was time for my mammogram and then called.

After they took the usual pictures, the nurse came back and said, we need a magnified view. (No big “duh” there!) They always needed a magnified view!  But this time, I knew why!  After the magnified view, she came back and said, we need to you step across the hall and have a sonogram.   Now, I was getting worried.  I watched the screen as she scanned my breast.  I saw a big black blob on the screen.   That couldn’t be good! Turns out it wasn’t!!!  Then the radiologist himself came into the room – THAT got my attention!  He explained that they were very concerned that what they were seeing was a cancerous tumor. They gave me a written report before I left. My mammogram report was a level 5: highly suggestive of malignancy.  Those are words you don’t want to see in print!! 

Of course, this was a Friday afternoon…late I might add.  Too late to go see my surgeon.  So, I called his office and made an appointment for Tuesday the next week.  That was the longest weekend of my life!  He also performed a sonogram on me.  I’ll NEVER forget the look on his face as he looked at the monitor. He wasn’t smiling.  He performed a needle biopsy right there on the table in his office.  That surprised me!  He was very upfront with me. He told me everything he saw suggested this was a cancerous tumor, but we’d have to wait until Friday to get the results.  Well, on Friday he walked into the treatment room and blurted it out without wasting any time. I guess they have to do it that way….it must be hard on them to tell someone they have cancer.  He said it was as he suspected….that I had infiltrating ductal carcinoma.  Those words were like a blur to me.  All I heard was carcinoma and I knew that wasn’t good!  And infiltrating carcinoma sounded even worse!  I asked the nurse to write it down, as I knew I’d never remember it.

Since I was his last patient of the day, he spent a lot of time with me in his office, going over all my treatment options.  He drew pictures and described all the various treatments. He was very patient with me.  He said I was a good candidate for a lumpectomy due to the size (2.5 cm) and location of the tumor.  He said I could have a mastectomy if I wanted, but that he didn’t think it was warranted in this case.  I met with one of the nurses after my appointment to schedule my surgery. I’ll never forget something she told me.  She said, “this is just a little bump in the road of life.”  And I remember thinking ‘is she nuts?  I have cancer!!!”   Well,  now that I’m a year down the road –and cancer free—I can honestly say she was right! It does almost seem like a blur….just a blip on the radar screen.

Well, to cut to the chase, I had two surgeries.  The first, a sentinel node biopsy, was to determine if my cancer had spread.  When I awoke, my surgeon said that he felt he’d gotten in all, and that the initial look at the 3 nodes he removed were negative.  When I went for my checkup and to get the pathology reports….he had some “not so good news.” It turns out that there was a microscopic cancer spot in the sentinel node.  It was only about 2 mm in size, but it was enough to change his prediction of “radiation only” to chemo followed by radiation. Ugh!!! The other problem was that they were not happy with the margins around the tumor.  He said he had to go back in to get more clear tissue around the tumor site.  If he couldn’t get it, I’d then be a candidate for a mastectomy.  I had a choice to make concerning his taking more nodes or not.  I was concerned that I might get lymphedema if he took more nodes.  The risk of the cancer spreading beyond that one spot in one node were remote….and I consulted two other doctors and several others in the medical field and got a variety of opinions. I finally decided to go ahead with the dissection of more nodes. I decided I couldn’t live with myself if the cancer had spread but I didn’t do anything about it.   As it turned out, my second surgery  was a success. My surgeon found no additional cancer in any of the nodes!!  He also was able to get clean tissue around the tumor site.  Whew!!!  And to date, almost two years after the surgery….I’ve had NO symptoms of lymphedema.

The only slight problem I had was a staph infection after the 2nd surgery.  It caused cellulitis  which was very uncomfortable, and was accompanied by a high fever.  They put me on Keflex and that cleared things up nicely.  Once the infection was gone, I was cleared for chemo.  I met my oncologist (Dr. Reid) and he explained the treatment, that he recommended and set me up with one of his nurses who gave me all the details.   And now….on with the rest of the journal!