The picture I have up now was taken last week. I decided to put up a current picture because this is what I look like now. It's so strange to thing the last picture was taken in March.

It's Sunday July 15,2007. Yesterday was a rough one. Saturday always is. I am tired today and feel a bit flu like. I will start to feel better Monday.

I have come to realize that this is my time to heal and take care of myself. This last week has been very stressful and upsetting for me. I feel it in my body and that is not good. Like a deep breath with exhale I have let it all go. I tend to worry about everything. The biggest worry ofcourse is my kids. Lately it has been about what they are eating and them helping to keep the house picked up. I know those are normal worries for parents but it is becoming too much for me because I can't control it. I'm too tire. Until I get well I will have to let it go.

My husband is trying not to say yes so much to the goodies. Its real hard for him. I don't understand because I say no at least 50 times  when I am at the mall or store with the kids. Its very easy for me: can I "No" Mom I want "No" Dad said we could "No". That is how it goes Then they go to even just the grocery store with Jon and come back with candy, those cheap quarter machine junk toys and whatever other toy they can find their way to. Then he gets home with them and wonders what the heck happened and why he can't say the magic word "NO"! The good news is between the two of us there is a balance. Thank God!

God couldn't have given me better children. I am so blessed but it is daily work to keep them that way I do have to ease up and let some things go for a while. Its too much for me to handle right now.

My mother in law is here and has been helping me so much. She has been a God send. Making dinner every night and catching me up on my laundry. We went to lunch the other day and walked around La Encantada mall. Just browsing in the stores and talking. It was almost blissful if it wasn't 105 out I really enjoyed our time. She will be staying with Jon while I'm away getting my surgeries. I won't have to worry and I know things will run smoothly and the kids will be fed well, homework done and to school on time. I was really worried about that as you can imagine! Thank you Diana

Lexi~ I was looking in the Louis Vuitton store (more like dreaming and drooling in the Louis Vuitton store) and the sales girl of course knew who you were. Discribed you to a T I was like yep that's my sister in law! She even showed me which bag you had! It was funny. Then our Mom called and said she was here and where was I? LOL! We had lunch at North. I thought of your bridal shower and how nice it was.

Michele~ Lets plan on lunch and seeing that movie Evening next friday. I enjoyed our talk the other day.

Please pray for me as I decide which hospital to go with. I am really hoping UCSF will be the one. I will know more next week. I know God will show me the way.

Michael~ Thank you for your advice and wisdom. It really helped.

I hope everyones summer is going well!